Picture an Hour: December 25, 2011

8:25 AMOne of the great things about having a teenager is that it's actually possible to sleep in on Christmas morning. Thanks to Maya, we actually got the tree up this year. She opted to not bother with lights, and chose the paper cranes and stars we worked on last Christmas but didn't use.



9:30 AMWatching Disney's A Chrismas Carol. We hadn't seen this version before, and we enjoyed it. Word of caution to parents of younger children; it's definitely not a children's movie.



10:14 AMMaryjane enjoying some cuddle time with Trevor. He is her favorite, despite the fact that he claims to dislike her. Such is the contrarian nature of the cat.


11:00 AM AprilTakingANap.jpg

12:00 PM AprilStillSleeping.jpg



1:12 PMThis is our fifth Christmas in Wisconsin, and the first one that hasn't been white. That little bit of snow left on the ground is from a tiny snow shower we had earlier in the week. Last year we already had over a foot on the ground due to a blizzard. I'm honestly not complaining too much.



2:00 PMWe've gotten into the habit of having steak on Christmas. 40 degree weather meant that Trevor could grill comfortably in just a long sleeved shirt instead of having to bundle up.



3:12 PMTrying to resist a food coma, and partaking of some of my Christmas chocolates. These are from The Pearl. They're handmade and incredibly delicious.



4:43 PMI'm not the greatest housekeeper. Lately I've been working on that, and have been trying to take care of things as soon as I notice them. While I was washing dishes, I noticed that this window was seriously dirty, so I took care of it as soon as I finished the dishes.



5:27 PMGetting ready to go to the Rotary Lights. I got Maya to stand still long enough to take a picture of the hat that Trevor's parents sent.



6:01 PMI'm glad the weather was mild enough to comfortably walk around the park instead of driving through. There are so many cool things you can miss in the car. Plus, as Trevor said, we weren't killing the earth. You can see the other photos I took here.



7:40 PMMy friend Donald came home from Racine a day early. He hadn't eaten all day, and I hadn't had any fried food in weeks, so we went to an Irish pub and slammed some Reuben egg rolls, cheese curds, and mussels, washing it down with a pitcher of Spotted Cow.



8:06 PM I'm pretty sure that the only reason the pub opened on Christmas was for the Packer/Bears game.



9:00 PMWe moved on to a gay bar, Players. As Donald said, "Gay bars are always open on Christmas." It's true. The next few hours were a procession of strong but fruity drinks with names I can't remember. Except this concoction, which was called a Blue Cock. It tasted like sherbet. This is a dangerous drink, folks.



10:08 PM His and hers. Mine tasted like strawberry soda. His was kind of peachy. Both were delicious.



11:00 PMDonald doesn't like having his picture taken, so he makes himself deliberately ugly. Totally logical.


And on that gorgeous note, the documentation of my Christmas ends. I got home around 12:30 AM and fell into a hard slumber until almost 1:00 PM. I declare Christmas a success. Happy Boxing Day!

My First Birchbox

I first heard about Birchbox several months ago, via another blog. I liked the idea--paying a monthly fee to receive deluxe beauty samples each month--but was afraid it might lead to some overspending, since you can also order full sized products directly from Birchbox.

Then I started thinking about how much money I've wasted over the years, buying full sized beauty products that didn't work out for me. I figured it'd be fun to get a surprise package in the mail each month, and to get to try before buying. So last month I bit the bullet and signed up. They ship the boxes once a month, so I was already past the date to receive a November box. My first one came just about a week ago.




The packaging was a lot of fun. It really is like opening up a present. I hope they stick with this approach as the company grows, and don't just start throwing the products into a box and calling it a day. There were a couple of bonus items, and a code to receive $20 off a $75 order.


1. EBoost Daily Health Booster: This little packet contained an orange flavored fizzy vitamin drink. It's loaded with vitamins, and a little caffeine. I tried it out the morning after I had a couple of drinks. The flavor is nice, except for one thing. Stevia. I am not a fan of Stevia at all. I would rather spend a few extra calories on some cane sugar than deal with the after taste. Too bad, because the drink did manage to wake me up. I think I'll stick to my hangover cure of a breakfast burrito and some apple juice in the future, though.

2. Orofluido Elixir: When you sign up for Birchbox, you take a brief survey so that they can customize some of your samples. One of the questions pertained to what kinds of products are more likely to make you splurge. I answered hair care products. I'm always up to try anything that will reduce frizz, or give me shine when I wear my hair straight. This serum fits the bill in both cases, and has the added bonus of smelling heavenly. It's a warm vanilla fragrance that isn't too sweet smelling. It's also non greasy. I can't wear it alone, because it doesn't provide a lot of definition, but it's great layered with my other products to add some softness and shine. I'll definitely be ordering it the next time I have some money to splurge on haircare.

3. Show Stoppers Fashion Tape: These double sided adhesive strips, along with the EBoost, were one of the bonus samples. I haven't used them yet, and don't have any reason to any time soon, so I'll probably be passing these along to my friend who does drag.

4. Benefit The Porefessional Primer: I've used a few different makeup primers, and this is hands down the best I've tried. It evened out my skin beautifully and felt incredibly light. I would even wear this as a foundation on a light makeup day. It's $29 for the full sized product, the same price as at Sephora. I'll definitely be buying this eventually, but since I wear makeup so rarely, the sample will last me awhile.

5. Jouer Cosmetics Moisturizing Lipgloss: Jouer Cosmetics made a shade of moisturizing lip gloss especially for Birchbox members. It looks hot pink in the tube, but it was super flattering pale pink when it went on. I liked the texture and the color, but won't be buying it because I couldn't find any definitive information on Jouer's animal testing policy. Usually, companies who don't test on animals are very transparent about it, because it's a great marketing tool. So I always assume that if I can't find it clearly stated, then they do test. This was the only cosmetic in the Birchbox that I was unable to find information for, either on the package or on the internet.

6. Harvey Prince Ageless in Pink Grapefruit: Upon reading the description of this fragrance--pink grapefruit, pomegranate, and jasmine--I was ultra excited. I can't wear a lot of fragrances, especially floral scents. However, I can usually handle jasmine, and I love almost all fruity scents. I was really disappointed to find that on me, this fragrance quickly turns incredibly floral. It smelled more like a mixture of mimosa and magnolia than any fruit. It was sickeningly sweet enough to give me a headache. I'll see if it smells differently on Maya, and if not I'll be passing it along to someone else.

So, all in all, I was very pleased with this month's selection and will continue to subscribe. Another feature of the site that's got me hooked is that you can review products and receive points. Every 100 points gets you $10 off a product order. I also emailed the company to ask if there could be an option to only receive cruelty free products, and while there is not at this time, I got a very timely, very polite response.

'Tis the Season to Be... Melancholy

It's 2:30 in the afternoon. I haven't gotten dressed yet. My accomplishments today have been to start my laundry, and send off an email with a contact list. I'm not being lazy. Compared to the first half of the week, I'm doing well. At least I'm awake.

I was first diagnosed with clinical depression at the age of sixteen. I've been fighting it, with and without medication, for half of my life now. Actually, more than half my life considering I was probably depressed for a year or more before I was actually diagnosed. Things have been going well, despite a lot of health issues, job instability and financial stress. And then, suddenly, after a week or so of finding it hard to get out of bed in the morning, this past weekend I just couldn't get out of bed at all. I know that this was partly initiated by my temp assignment ending, but looking back, I realized that I've really spent the past couple of months in a haze. That's how a major episode always happens, it seems. I get to the point of debilitation, and it feels sudden, but in hindsight it was weeks in the making.

One of the hardest parts of living with depression, though, is that even once I know what's going on, and even when I know what I need to do to help myself, it's so hard to climb out of it. I can tell myself that it's due to lack of sunlight, and the pressures of having a perfect holiday and the stress of being financially strapped, but knowing doesn't make it any easier to handle, because my mind wants to think of every little thing it can to defeat itself. For example, we haven't put up the Christmas tree yet. This is how my thought process went when I thought about it:

"It's December 15 and we don't have a tree up yet. I wanted to decorate the whole house and even be able to bake and do some crafts and I haven't even gotten out the tree. I haven't bought any gifts. I have all this time since I don't have an assignment, why can't I do it? Probably because the house is a mess and I don't even know where we'll put the tree. So I have to clean at least the family room or living room first. Oh god, I don't even know where to start. Okay, just start in one corner and work your way around. It's a half an hour to an hour, tops. But what's the point? I'll get distracted and not finish. I never finish anything. It's so late in the season. I wanted to do this Thanksgiving weekend. What's wrong with me? Why am I so useless? I should ask for help. But why? This shouldn't be that hard, why am I making it so hard..."

You get the drift. This can go on for awhile, until I move on to another subject. Combine these marathons of self flagellation with physical pain and fatigue, and the result is the inability to do much of anything at all. This is how I spent much of Monday and Tuesday. I'm so grateful that I took on a volunteer stage managing position, because auditions were the only thing that got me out of bed and in the shower those days. I even tried to go out with friends on Tuesday night, but begged to come home an hour and a half in because I was feeling panicky.

I've been thinking about everything that I can usually get accomplished in a day when things are going well, and I get so frustrated. This usually kicks off another round of circular rumination. So it's time to make the doctor's appointment, check the medication, try to start getting that grip again.

It's hard to write about this, since I do like to focus on positive things, but I know that seasonal and holiday depression aren't uncommon, and sometimes being inundated with everyone else's gift guides and wishlists and holiday cheer can make you wonder if you're all alone in just feeling a little disconnected from it all.

We Gather Together

Since we moved to Wisconsin, we haven't been able to spend Thanksgiving with either of our families. We've done the cooking thing a couple of times, but ended up with way too much food and not enough fridge space. The most eventful was Thanksgiving of 2009. We closed on our house the day before, and moved everything that day to avoid having to pay for the U-Haul for more than one day. Thanksgiving dinner consisted of a meal from the hot food bar at the grocery store, but it was probably one of the best Thanksgivings I've ever had. Last year we had a restaurant meal. All of this was just fine, but I missed the large gatherings that I was used to. I was incredibly grateful when my friend Chelsea invited us to her house for Thanksgiving.

I always refer to Chelsea as the Hostess with the Mostest. I love hanging out at her house because she welcomes her friends into her beautiful home as though they're family, and she's also a great and generous cook. I made cornbread dressing from my grandmother's recipe and Trevor made a triple layer cake consisting of two layers of white chocolate cake and a middle layer of cranberry cheesecake.

We arrived in time to watch the last half of the Packers game and enjoy some appetizers. In addition to Chelsea and her husband, Matt, we also got to celebrate with her mom and her Noni.







We also got to meet Noni's dogs, Lucky and Raleigh. Unfortunately, this also meant that we didn't see even a glimpse of the cats, Pete and Jack.




Matt had decided to try grilling a turkey for the first time. Here's Trevor bringing it inside. It didn't turn out quite as planned, but it did end up having a nice flavor, despite being a bit dry. Pretty good for a turkey that was actually on fire for a minute. Luckily, Chelsea also roasted another bird. I told Maya that some of the best holiday memories come from the unexpected. I'm pretty sure I'll never forget this turkey that Chelsea dubbed "Turkey Jerky."





Once the turkeys were ready, there was a flurry of activity in the kitchen to finish up all the sides. There was a ton of my favorites, such as green bean casserole and mashed potatoes, as well as a couple of things like white bread stuffing and cheesy potatoes, that I've come to love since moving to the Midwest.



Photo by Betsy Murphy
Dinner was so delicious, and I ended up being too full for dessert. We lazed around watching reality shows on Lifetime for awhile. Chelsea dozed off (she and I had drank quite a bit of wine while the food was cooking) and I was on the verge of dozing off when it was time to leave.


Maya became great friends with Raleigh. She's quite a snuggler.

We came home with a few leftovers, mostly dessert. I'm so glad that we got to spend Thanksgiving with a bigger group this year. It makes things so much more festive, and it makes me feel like putting in more effort. Chelsea's family is just as awesome and welcoming as she is and I'm so glad to have gotten to spend Thanksgiving with them.